About selfbondage and auto erotic bondage


This is an email I recieved as a reply to Anna on Selfbondage.

Firstly, I think you did an excellent job answering the question. Indeed, your second paragraph on selfbondage as a form of meditation is a notion I had not considered before, but now find quite appealing. (So thank you for that.)
Personally, I'd have to say that the appeal varies greatly, not just between people, but (in my case, at least), depending on one's mood. Having had a look through the forum, it's clear that there's no unifying answer to the question.
Some people seem to enjoy planning and carrying out everything, then struggle when they are bound (one poster, for instance, complained about having trouble carrying through with his plans because, while bound, he kept coming up with ways to force the release mechanism early (pull hard enough to break the ice in an ice-lock or key release, for instance.))
Others seem entirely into the submission side, either as a form of relaxation or being excited by the sensation/fear-of-discovery.
Still others appear to be looking for a surrogate lover (essentially masturbation for those who like being bound).
Some are interested in replicating the discipline sensation of a total power exchange relationship - particularly prevalent on the software board, since it's largely based on getting the computer to dominate the user.
It can even be a form of training you in specific sexual or submission skills, such as the program designed to only release you after you perform a blowjob on a dildo to its satisfaction, or enema retention rigs.
Personally, I'm pretty much all over the map, unless it touches on something I'm genuinely afraid of (anything to do with the neck, due to breathing concerns, or simply being discovered) or just find gross.
So, it really is not even remotely a simple question. The answer varies depending on the practitioner and on the vagaries of their psyche. And even then, it's one of those things that is very difficult to actually explain verbally (partly due to language limitations and partly due to how rare it is for people to actually talk about subjects like this).